November 15, 2003: Journal Entry

(A Woman’s Journal – a blank journal with quotes by women). “Noble deeds and hot baths are the best cures for depression: – Dodie Smith b. 1896 English Playwright

I’m on a flight to Albuquerque, NM today. It is going to be a long day for Saturday, but fairly restful. I get to write and read and nap. Hard to complain about that.

My dad is staying with the girls at my house. The house I got early occupancy in, the closing date extended many times and just yesterday the cheerful voice message from my realtor saying, “the seller is trying to get $7000 in interest waved by her mortgage holder so we can even close.” She further suggested that we begin looking for other properties when I return from this trip, and “I hope you have a nice day.” Simply hysterical. I couldn’t help but laugh.

All the effort to move and then news like that. My children have been uprooted, my address changed, utilities changed – everything. This is a practice of faith and I’m ok with that.

I am really going to be missing my babies this week. They are so so incredibly wonderful, each with their own personality, thoughts, and opinions. I get to be their mom and that’s an honor because who else do we get to know in life that well, if not our children?

Published by Trudy Sobocienski

My blog, "Beyond Leadership" is a creative place to share my personal feelings and thoughts while working in leadership roles for a variety of Alaska Native organizations, both for and not-for profit entities. An incredible leader and mentor of mine once asked while we were in Washington, DC, "What happened to you between the ages of 7-10 that motivated you to serve in a native leadership capacity". I was struck by that poignant thought and as such, include actual entries from my mother and my diaries beginning in the early 1970's. I enjoy sharing these excerpts because it captures the parallels she and I were experiencing throughout life, from two separate worldviews. Hers as a young mother of four and mine as her eldest child. I have never came across a book on leadership that lays bare a leaders personal feelings, thoughts, hopes, fears and dreams they were experiencing. So for me, my goal is two-fold: 1. Share the incredible life my parents created for my siblings and I growing up in remote Alaska; and, 2) Sharing my humanity, through my personal diaries and journals, while serving as the youngest-ever President/CEO for the Alaska Native Health Board. There are passages that will include significant policy issues I was working on throughout my career and travels. There are many more passages that do not. I cannot speak for my mom's passages, because I am reading them as I share them here, with you; with her permission of course.

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